Okay, buckle up because I think this is the full moniker of this product:
Mike's Premium Malt Cocktails Pomegranate Martini with Acai Berries.
You're somebody (in your circle of friends), You enjoy the finer things in life (like your Dodge Stratus, lack of socks and deep desire to have a pet alligator on a leash) so you know what you want to be seen with, smell like and inside you. Enter the Pomegranate Martini in a pop-top bottle four-pack.
They're small, presumably tasty and most important of all, if you look real close at my horrible photograph you can see it reads: "Alcohol Included Ready To Drink". Thank the Makers. I HATE having to buy flavored water in one part of the store and then take my shopping cart all the way to the other side of the store to buy GenericBrand™ 100 % Pure Alcohol just to mix them together when I get home to make booze to get blotto on. That's like chemistry and that's like no fun unless something get's blow'd up.
I wasn't even sure what category to put this under, Booze? Ghetto Wine? Martini? Heck, this isn't a martini because I didn't make one Bond joke, other than the one you'll need to get out of the pokey after swilling this "malt cocktail" and tripping the night fantastic. I mean once a lady sees you choking one of these down she'll have no choice but to drippily ponder your erudite sophistication & charisma +3, right? Right. What does that even mean? I'll show you a malt cocktail, by gum.
No comments:
Post a Comment